Apocalyptic Homesteading (Day 1054)
Hello Everyone!
Another restless night, Succeeding at failure, Building a new shoddy porch & Burning waste debris!
Alright, it is about an hour and a half after sunset and I never wrote anything today so I better see what all I can spell out before the fatigue catches up to me. I almost convinced myself to not write anything and go to sleep, or just quit writing these entries all together... so we will see how it goes.
Doing either of those things seems like a good idea and both are probably better ideas than trying to keep fighting the tide of failure which seems to encompass everything that I frigging do. Seriously, my new favorite saying over the previous year has been: The only thing that I have ever succeeded at is failure.
That sentiment is much more of a 'reminder' than a 'motto' but I doubt most folks will grasp the distinction there either way... so I do not think it is all that worthwhile to attempt to explain it in detail... or let alone try to get the meaning across to those incapable of understanding the streak of wry pragmatic mirth that the saying is meant to be imbued with.
Anyways, I almost got to sleep at a reasonable hour last night but the same thing occurred as the night before where I just could not quite fall asleep and when I did... I would just wake right back up again. Eventually some time around four in the morning I finally fell all the way asleep... just to yet again wake up four hours later. Two days in a row of that mixed with too much anxiety to take naps... is not doing me any good but hell it is not like anything else is 'doing me any good' so go figure.
Once I was awake enough to do so, I went on a brief hike hoping to clear my mind but it did not really help. So instead I decided to finally bite the proverbial bullet and fix that 'front porch' that has slowly been falling apart for the better part of the previous year. Previously I had kept adding more pieces of plywood to it as a 'temporary fix' but since the 'porch' itself was a 'temporary' solution to begin with... it just kept falling apart more and more.
Honestly, I should have tore it all out and fixed it quite some time back given its shoddy condition but it was not until it was a massive hazard to me or the dogs that I actually bothered to fix it. I will not defend my procrastination but considering everything that has gone on it is amazing that I have done anything (including that task) around here.
Of course taking the old 'porch' apart was probably the worst part of the entire task because I not only needed to get all the decking screws removed from it... but I also had to take care not to scatter a bunch of rusty nails around the area in the process. The wood was also rotting and much of it was squished together from all my patch jobs but eventually I got it all dismantled and loaded all the waste material into the wagon.
All things considered it was nice to just focus on building something even if the materials I used to make the new 'porch' were not in much better condition than the old materials that I had torn up. In other words, I will probably wind up ripping that new porch apart and scrapping something else together in the future but hopefully this one will make it (at the very least) as long as the previous one did.
It was rather late in the afternoon by the time I got all of that done but I immediately switched gears and pulled the wagon over to the fire pit and began the long slow process of burning all the damp and rotting waste debris. I did not quite let it all 'turn to ash' because just getting it burned 'mostly' down took until just before sunset... and by then I was totally over it and there was no way I was going to stand around after dark poking and prodding the fire... just for more ashes.
Okay, I am going to wrap this up and keep it 'short and not-so-sweet' because I just do not have it in me tonight to add anything else. I hope that everyone is doing well and has a nice day/night.
https://peakd.com/c/hive-114308/created
I have been having the same problem with sleep, I sleep an hour and then watch TV until I can fall back asleep when I wake I have only slept for another hour.
Your porch looks nice.
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