The other day the new HR wanted to have a 1on1 meeting with all members of the development team. He's not really entirely new anymore but he started working in the company this year. I didn't have any opportunities to speak to him, because if I need something from HR, I would talk to the other HR who's been with the company for long. So I was surprised when he proposed a 1on1 meeting. What could be this talk that my calendar was blocked for an hour?

Our development team is a foreign team, with only 1 Japanese engineer who can also speak English. Actually, this Japanese engineer is our CTO. Our tech lead is Chinese and he can speak English and Japanese very well. Then there's the rest of us. I'm not so confident with my Japanese though I can read and listen well, speaking and writing, not so.

Then came the day of the 1on1 session. I reread the calendar invite again and saw the topic was about "interview about our human resource system". I was still confused what could this mean but I attended the session with an open mind.

It was our first interaction so we introduced ourselves properly. If I've been going to the office, I would probably introduced myself face to face but I haven't been going for months now. Good thing he can speak English a little bit. He asked what would be my preferred language. If there's a question like this, it's English of course but being the considerate me, I told him we can talk in both languages so he could also be comfortable.

I learned prior to his work in our company, he was a sales guy in another company but he didn't do well. Sales wasn't his calling. Besides he's an accountant and he enjoyed being one. I think he's also an accountant in our company now aside from being an HR.

In Japan, it seems so natural to move to another job even when your history aren't related to the new job. Even when you don't have an experience to this new job, you can still get it. Giving chances? Probably.

When I first applied to this company, I was so hesitant and kept telling the recruiter, I didn't think I'd be suitable for the job. I didn't have the experience of working with the technologies listed in the job description but the recruiter kept encouraging me so I tried to apply and got the job. They gave me a chance. Almost 3 years and I'm still working for the same company that gave me chance.

It's not all the time that there's someone who'll give you chances, and I think if he/she does, that person is being generous or probably sees a potential in you. If you meet someone like that, I think you should treasure that connection.

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Back to the 1on1, he asked me if I like my job. This is actually a very difficult question. Do you like your job?

Seeing that I was thinking deeply, he rephrased the question and asked me if there are things that I didn't like about my job.

To be honest, I like what I am doing. I enjoy coding. It's not something I imagined myself to be doing for a long time, but 14 years in the industry and I still enjoy it. I would probably still be coding for the next 5 years or so.

I like the setup of our team. We're free to choose what tasks we want to do. And we have goal setting - which we can use to learn more about anything. Last time my goal was to learn more about React and so I signed up for a training and posted the things I learned in @wittythedev account. I'm already using React at work but I wanted to learn more and so the company refunded my training fees. It's nice because there's room for growth and continuous learning.

He asked me more questions like what could be the KPT (Keep, Problem, Try) of the company. I forgot my answers already but I think we can also apply this to our lives. Take a pause, try to meditate and write down - what are the things that you want to keep? How about the problems you think you have in your life? What can you try to maybe improve your quality of life?

Lately I'm in battle in my thoughts. I'm a multitasker so you won't probably see me having a breakdown already because as much as possible, I try to keep my life still working. I should probably start doing KPT with my life. You should try too, before you get to a point where I am now.

That 1on1 session ended with what voicing out my concerns at that moment because I wasn't so prepared, I haven't listed all the things I wanted. Besides, I don't want to demand too much.

I think even when you don't think about your life now, I think you should start. Do you still like what you're doing? What are the things that you enjoy? If those things will be taken away from you, do you think you'll survive? What do you want to improve in your current lifestyle? What are the problems that you see?

I think once a while, try to assess yourself. Don't wait when the emotions are overwhelming for you to deeply think about yourself.

The session opened up these thoughts and now I'm in a crisis. Or maybe I've been already in crisis and this just made me realize I am in one.

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Thanks for reading!
See you around! じゃあ、またね！

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With love,

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^{All photos are taken using my phone unless stated otherwise.}