Due of my past experience, I played the middleman.
One of the constants in life is disagreement. Disagreements can arise when individuals do not hold the same views or when one or both sides interpret a situation incorrectly.
Every aspect of life has disagreements at some point, whether in the family, amongst friends and even generally between tribes or nations. It is better for the people involved in a quarrel to sit down and work out a resolution before it escalates. However, a conflict or war between the contested parties would result from disagreement if the parties are unable to come to an agreement and establish a common ground for peace.
Some disputes or conflicts can even be resolved by one or both sides apologizing, but occasionally ego stops people from doing so. I'm an easy-going dude that dislikes getting into arguments with others. I don't like folks that get angry easily and are always looking for a battle. I frequently avoid such folks.
However, no matter how hard we try to avoid arguments or disputes, they inevitably arise, regardless of how close the friends between the persons involved are. Even I came to the realization that conflicts may either strengthen or break up a connection. I could continue to talk about the theory of conflict, but I think it would be more helpful to start by sharing my experience as a middleman.
I often avoid attempting to resolve any issue that is not urgent or relevant to me. So I don't try to stop a fight or argument between two individuals when I observe it. I merely strolled by. But a fight broke out under my supervision, and I can't help but get involved.
My middlemanship
There aren't enough dorm rooms in my institution to house all the students. Therefore, a lot is set aside for individuals who will be given bed spaces, and others who are unfortunate will have to find lodging outside the school's grounds, which is more expensive than the hostels.
The second option available to students is to squat with their buddies or pay those who have available beds to let them do so. Squatting has grown commonplace in school hostels despite being forbidden by the school administration. Since I haven't received a bed since my first year of college, I have had to squat with friends for the past three sessions.
The argument between two of my roommates occurred in 2019, during my second year of college. One was the bed-space owner (commonly referred to as Bonafide). The formal bed intended for the bonafide was shared by the squatter as well. Along the process, disagreements between the two men began to emerge about matters like cleaning the bed linens.
The bonafide anticipated the squatter to have washed the bedsheets as they were already soiled and that his squatter always uses his clean dishes and plates and leaves them dirty after using them or fails to wash them on time. As a result, they got into a heated argument. The way his bonafide always treated him also caused the squatter to have some second thoughts.
Since I was in a class higher than the two parties, they sort of looked up to me, and whenever they make a point, they constantly want me to testify. If the squatter uses the bonafide's pot without cleaning it, as an illustration. The bonafide would remark, if I were around,
"Tomi you can see what he has done again, the pot and plates I left clean are again soiled."
A large argument emerged from this long-lasting argument. But like the superman that I was, I entered the scene and saved the day (lol). Each party was given a seat at the table, and I explained where they had both erred.
I told the two gentlemen about my first year of college and my personal experience with my Bonafide.
In my first year of college, I was the one who prepared the meals, and my bona fide just eats without doing any dishwashing. Every time I want to cook again, I have to wash the dishes by hand. I once informed my bona fide that he had to decide which chore to perform since I couldn't do both cooking and dishwashing. This led to a heated quarrel that needed the assistance of other roommates to resolve.
I provided them advice on how to divide their tasks after sharing my first year's experience with them. The argument came to an end when they both thanked me.
I consider myself a superb mediator (lol). Do you agree?