Let's talk about male approval✅ | Rejection of your essence!
Hola, mis queridas mujeres✨
Hace días me topé con un impertinente muchacho de mi pasado, que al verme lo más brillante que se le ocurrió decirme fue Ahora sí te ves👌🏽, haciendo un gesto aprobatorio. Ni siquiera respondí a eso, portándome lo más cortante posible y con ganas de insultarlo, pero no valía la pena perder mi paz por eso. Sin embargo esto me dejó pensando, que hace años me habría sentido bien con ese comentario, porque "Ahora si estoy bonita".
Hoy en día, ese me pareció el comentario más desagradable y ridículo del mundo, así que me alegré mucho por mí, porque ya no tengo esa necesidad de buscar esa Aprobación masculina.
Muchas mujeres a diario, incluyéndome, hemos sido víctimas en algún momento de un comentario algo pasado de tono, un comentario que en el fondo tiene una intención machista y no necesariamente debe provenir siempre de un hombre, porque lamentablemente existen mujeres que apoyan estos pensamientos, pero ustedes dirán ¿Qué comentarios? ¿Cuáles pensamientos? Comentarios y pensamientos destinados a nada más y nada menos que obtener la aprobación masculina.
¿Alguna vez te sentiste menos por no encajar en los estándares de belleza? ¿Alguna vez anhelaste ser la protagonista de esos comentarios en las conversaciones de hombres sobre mujeres bonitas y "exuberantes"? Porque yo si y quiero contarte esta historia, quizá te sientes identificada o quizá yo no te agrade mucho, pero permíteme explicarte que gracias al cielo, ya no pienso de esta manera y pude darme cuenta de lo que estaba pasando.
Hello, my dear ladies✨
Days ago I ran into an impertinent boy from my past, and when he saw me the most brilliant thing that occurred to him to say to me was Now you really look👌🏽 making an approving gesture. I did not even respond to that, behaving as polite as possible and wanting to insult him, but it was not worth losing my peace for that. However, this left me thinking that years ago I would have felt good with that comment, because "Now I look pretty".
Nowadays, that seemed to me the most disgusting and ridiculous comment in the world, so I was very happy for me because I no longer have that need to look for that Male approval.
Many women every day, including me, have been victims at some point of a comment something overtone, a comment that deep down has a macho intention and not necessarily must always come from a man, because unfortunately there are women who support these thoughts, but you will say What comments? What thoughts? Comments and thoughts aimed at nothing more and nothing less than getting male approval.
Have you ever felt less because you don't fit the beauty standards? Have you ever longed to be the protagonist of those comments in men's conversations about beautiful and "lush" women? Because I have and I want to tell you this story, maybe you feel identified or maybe you don't like me very much, but let me explain that thank heavens, I no longer think this way and I was able to realize what was going on.
Yo era una muchacha bastante insegura de sí misma, de su cuerpo, de sus pensamientos, de sus acciones, odiaba todo de mí. No me sentía cómoda en mi propio cuerpo y a lo largo de mi vida estuve buscando todo tipo de aprobación, especialmente la masculina.
Me sentía bien siendo vista "diferente a las otras chicas", cuando en el fondo, por supuesto que soy como las otras chicas, adoro serlo, adoro mi energía femenina, pero no siempre fue así.
Me rodeaba de "amigos hombres" porque "las mujeres eran huecas", pero la realidad es que solo estaba ahí por aprobación y me sentía bastante incómoda con los comentarios de varones, mucho más aún, cuando se ponían a hablar del físico de otras mujeres, pero, yo quería "ser uno de ellos" quería y anhelaba esa aprobación, así que muchas veces me burlé y señalé a otras mujeres por cosas que yo quería hacer, pero no me atrevía.
Cosas como ser femenina, escuchar otro tipo de música, no ser una "atrevida", ser el modelo "ideal para un hombre" y todas esas estupideces.
Todos estos pensamientos y comportamientos que tenía, eran solo un reflejo de lo insegura que me sentía de mí misma y la poca personalidad que tenía.
Han pasado varios años desde que era adolescente y pensaba de esa manera y créanme que siempre me arrepiento de haberme perdido la oportunidad de rodearme de esa energía femenina, de conocer mujeres maravillosas o hacer cosas que sé que me hubiese encantado hacer por tener ese prejuicio de que si me comportaba de esa forma "no le gustaría a ningún hombre, ninguno me tomaría en serio porque a ellos no les gustan las mujeres tan libres", a ese tipo de comentarios me refiero.
I was a girl who was quite insecure about herself, her body, her thoughts, her actions, I hated everything about myself. I was not comfortable in my own body and throughout my life I was looking for all kinds of approval, especially male approval.
I felt good being seen as "different from the other girls", when deep down, of course I am like the other girls, I love being, I love my feminine energy, but it wasn't always like that.
I surrounded myself with "male friends" because "women were hollow", but the reality is that I was only there for approval and I felt quite uncomfortable with male comments, much more so, when they would talk about other women's physique, but, I wanted to "be one of them" I wanted and craved that approval, so many times I teased and pointed at other women for things I wanted to do, but didn't dare.
Things like being feminine, listening to other types of music, not being a "daredevil", being the "ideal model for a man" and all that stupid stuff.
All these thoughts and behaviors I had, were just a reflection of how insecure I felt about myself and how little personality I had.
It has been several years since I was a teenager and I thought that way and believe me I always regret having missed the opportunity to surround myself with that feminine energy, to meet wonderful women, or to do things that I know I would have loved to do because I had that prejudice that if I behaved that way "no man would like me, no man would take me seriously because they do not like women so free ", that kind of comments I mean.
Es algo lamentable la verdad, una vez que te das cuenta de lo que está pasando y como te ponen a competir con otras mujeres, como te sientes mejor si a una la desprecian y a ti te "halagan", como rechazas tu energía femenina solo por esa aprobación que buscas deliberadamente y como a veces hasta en tu familia o círculo cercano apoyan estos comportamientos y pensamientos, sé que mínimo alguna vez escuchaste algo así o te sentiste "superior" a otra mujer por "no actuar de esa manera".
Y no estoy diciendo que los hombres son los malos y que todos son así, para nada. Estoy refiriéndome a ciertos patrones y comportamientos que a veces hasta inconscientemente fomentamos, incluso siendo mujeres, porque yo lo fui.
Solo quiero decirte que eres fabulosa a tu manera, con tus gustos, con tu forma de vestir, con tu forma de hablar, expresarte y comportarte, con tus kilos de más o de menos, con tu vida sexual activa o inactiva, con tu gusto a las fiestas o al silencio de tu habitación, eres maravillosa y no intentes ser otra cosa en búsqueda de esta aprobación.
Sé que suena cliché y quizá esto lo digan en cada película que puedas ver, pero lo cliché por algo es cliché y es porque es real. Aquel que diga amarte no te hará competir y luchar por su "aprobación".
Dejemos de luchar por tener aprobación masculina.
Solo quería desahogar esto por aquí hoy, por si alguna de ustedes se siente identificada. Las quiero muchísimo.
Once you realize what is going on and how they put you in competition with other women, how you feel better if one woman is despised and you are "flattered", how you reject your feminine energy just for that approval that you deliberately seek and how sometimes even in your family or close circle support these behaviors and thoughts, I know that at least once you heard something like that or felt "superior" to another woman for "not acting that way".
And I'm not saying that men are the bad guys and that everyone is like that, not at all. I'm referring to certain patterns and behaviors that we sometimes even unconsciously encourage, even as women, because I was one.
I just want to tell you that you are fabulous in your own way, with your tastes, with the way you dress, with the way you speak, express yourself and behave, with your extra or fewer kilos, with your active or inactive sex life, with your taste for parties or the silence of your room, you are wonderful and do not try to be something else in search of this approval.
I know it sounds cliché and maybe they say this in every movie you can see, but cliché is cliché for a reason and it is because it is real. The one who claims to love you will not make you compete and fight for their "approval."
Let's stop fighting for male approval.
I just wanted to vent this out here today, in case any of you can relate. I love you all dearly.
Thanks for coming here and reading me, I hope to see you in my next post! ♥️
- Texto original de: @rosylisboa
- Todos los derechos/Rosy Lisboa.
- Banner y portada realizados por mi en Canva y Picsart.
- Las fotos vistas en esta publicación tienen su respectiva fuente.
- Original text by: @rosylisboa
- All rights reserved/Rosy Lisboa.
- The banner and front page were made by me in Canva and Picsart.
- The photos seen in this publication have their respective source.
You have received 1.0000 LOH for posting in Ladies of Hive. We believe that you should be rewarded for the time and effort spent in creating articles. The goal is to encourage token holders to accumulate and hodl LOH tokens over a long period of time.
I completely hear what you went through! We all have issues these kinds of thoughts and issues; even those whom we think fit the 'perfect' mold. Chances are, they are dissatisfied with something about themselves as well.
Male approval-no, just from my husband, but I also think we tend to have times every now and again, when we don't like something (or many things) about ourselves. Acceptance of who we are seems to be a bit of a rollercoaster at times. Maybe it's just me; oh and age has absolutely NOTHING to do with it. You might be young; you might be older.
Anyway, thank you for sharing; sorry for the book. Take care! !LADY
View or trade
LOH
tokens.@elizabethbit, you successfully shared 0.1000 LOH with @rosylisboa and you earned 0.1000 LOH as tips. (2/20 calls)
Use !LADY command to share LOH! More details available in this post.
You are absolutely right about it having nothing to do with age. I always meant that you have to do everything and fit in to have that approval or else "they wouldn't pay attention to you". I hope your husband is not one of these types of men and I wish them the best, thanks to you for reading! <3
Hi @rosylisboa! Fortunately, my husband is not like that at all. He's the real deal and I'm lucky to have him! Take care and have a lovely weekend!