Getting Lost

My daily routine is being contradicted in many ways. If I am working to solve one contradiction then there comes another one to poke at my daily lifestyle. Unexpected ones are beyond description, sometimes some come in such a way that it almost eats the day as well as the next ones as well. So, fasten your seatbelts because I am gonna show you the art of contradictions that has messed up my daily lifestyle so precisely that you may be able to relate with some for sure.

It was 10..00 pm when I determined that I would go to bed by 11 and sleep so that I could wake up early in the morning, did the same and slept by 12. In the morning, at 8.00 am, I am feeling so tired. Wait a minute, did I just get tired? Yeah, I did. I got tired while sleeping, wtf!! That's how it's been going on, I got down from bed at 10.00 am. Still, it was beneficial for my health as I was going through some sleepless nights for the past few weeks or months.

📸 Artur Shamsutdinov

It's been three weeks since my final exams are over, I had so many plans to execute and none got to see the lights. Why? Did I have any major things that hampered my plan? No, it was my ignorance or the art of wasting time that made this delay. Last week, I got some tasks, self brought, but I haven't touched them. I was helpless too, and had to travel to Dhaka twice for some unavoidable tasks. Still, I am in Dhaka but this time I came prepared not to waste any of my time.

In my daily routine, I don't have any unnecessary hangouts like before, and no movie list, in fact I haven't watched any films for the last year and a half, max one or two whereas there was a time when I used to watch a movie every day or an ongoing series, one or the other. I was planning to be productive and cut off the major time-consuming habits that used to eat a chunk of my time but the tiny ones are still hovering around and causing damage. For example, social media addiction is still here, this fu**ing thing takes almost three to four hours minimum scrolling through the shits. Yeah, I am being mean to myself, I wished I was banned from all social media except Twitter.

The habit of distracting while being in a focused state is what bugs me the most and I am suffering due to this almost every day. Suppose, I am writing this one, I know what to write, where to go, and I am in a flow. Suddenly I would see myself with the phone, scrolling through social media or something else, when I regain consciousness I come back to the keyboard and start writing. I know, there is no harm in taking breaks between writings and we all do but those breaks are meant to be relaxing ones, not the ones that clog up our minds even more, hope you understand the point that I am trying to clear.

There are many more, countless ones, I wish I could make a list one by one and press the delete button so as not to stumble on them ever again. Can I do that? Lemme know if you have any delete ideas, worked on many and not get any permanent solution, they get mutated in other forms, or there aren't any solutions? What are your thoughts? I am really frustrated with myself over these.

So yeah, that's it for now, lemme go and grab a coffee and see if that can regain some attention to hold on to a specific task and complete that.

Have a great day,
Take Care!