Pesada soledad / Heavy loneliness | 5 minute FreeWrite
Unsplash, Suhyeon Choi
SPANISH VERSION
Recientemente fui a visitar a una tía, bueno no es mi tía como tal su esposo es mi tío, aunque ya murió. Ella es uno de esos casos que no tienen una explicación lógica, por más que busqué respuestas, no la halle y para ella que lo sufre tampoco hubo una, por lo que solo puedo decir que es uno de los misterios de Dios, que le será resuelto cuando ella este en su presencia.
Perdió a su esposo de cáncer de hígado, cinco años después su hijo mayor se suicida, luego muere su única hija de leucemia y doce años más tarde año 2021, muere su hijo menor el único que le quedaba, ambos desarrollaron un lazo muy estrecho originado por sus pérdidas, tanto que él temía por su mamá cada vez que se enfermaba o se sentía indispuesta y no quería levantarse ,rápidamente buscaba animarla diciéndole: anda a regar tus matas, toma un poco sol , suda, siéntete viva ,la cama es para la noche y la siesta.
Fueron perdidas muy dolorosas no hay palabras para describir semejante escenario, pedía a gritos una respuesta ¿Por qué los perdí? ¿Por qué no fui yo? Cada entierro era desgarrador.
No puedo evitar que se humedezcan mis ojos al recordar esos terribles e inexplicables momentos, que confrontaron mi fe, ya son ocho meses desde que quedó sola , en una casa inmensa, pero providencialmente, la única nieta que le quedo tuvo dos hijos , así que tiene 2 bisnietos. Se vino del extranjero donde estaba al enterarse y ahora vive con ella.
Mi tía tiene 83 años y aun con todas las patologías que ha desarrollado, que han afectado su salud considerablemente, es una mujer activa y no se permite estar totalmente dependiente de ella.
En mi visita, faltaron horas para oírla hablar de todo lo que ha vivido, lloró, rió y hasta cantó, para el final de la tarde me dijo: no entiendo porque Dios me mantiene en esta tierra todavía si no le soy útil a nadie, y su nieto que tiene unos 5 años le replico desde dentro de la casa: Para que yo tenga dos abuelas y me quieran mucho. Esa espontanea e inocente respuesta la hizo reír y luego decir: Ah, ya sé porque sigo aquí. Aquel comentario casi como si se tratara de una respuesta divina la llevo a reflexionar sobre su existencia. Luego continúo diciendo: Bueno ya no le pido a mi creador que acabe mis días, que sea cuando me toque. No puedo entender cómo, pero sé que estaré bien. Me asombra la fortaleza que tiene para resistir tan brutales golpes de la vida.
ENGLISH VERSION
Recently I went to visit an aunt, well she is not my aunt as such, her husband is my uncle, although he has already died. She is one of those cases that have no logical explanation, as much as I looked for answers, I did not find one and for her who suffers there was not one either, so I can only say that it is one of God's mysteries, which will be solved when she is in his presence.
She lost her husband to liver cancer, five years later her eldest son committed suicide, then her only daughter died of leukemia and twelve years later in 2021, her youngest son died, the only one she had left, both developed a very close bond originated by their losses, so much so that he feared for his mother every time she got sick or felt unwell and did not want to get up, he quickly sought to encourage her by telling her: "go and water your plants, go to water your plants, go to water your plants": go water your plants, get some sun, sweat, feel alive, the bed is for the night and the nap.
They were very painful losses, there are no words to describe such a scenario, I was screaming for an answer: Why did I lose them? Why wasn't it me? Each burial was heartbreaking.
It has been eight months since she was left alone in a huge house, but providentially, the only granddaughter she had left had two children, so she has two great-grandchildren. She came from abroad where she was when she found out and now lives with her.
My aunt is 83 years old and even with all the pathologies she has developed, which have affected her health considerably, she is an active woman and does not allow herself to be totally dependent on her.
During my visit, it took hours to hear her talk about everything she has lived, she cried, laughed and even sang, by the end of the afternoon she told me: I do not understand why God keeps me on this earth if I am not useful to anyone, and her grandson who is about 5 years old replied from inside the house: So that I have two grandmothers and they love me very much. That spontaneous and innocent answer made her laugh and then say: Ah, I know why I am still here. That comment, almost as if it were a divine answer, made her reflect on her existence. Then she continued: "Well, I no longer ask my creator to end my days, but when it is my turn. I can't understand how, but I know I will be fine. I am amazed at the strength she has to withstand such brutal blows of life.
Tema Generador: Estaré bien
It is pretty creepy the way everyone is ignoring what is happening to me and still going to Hivefest. Lay the dirty snatches out why dont ya. Fake it all you want creeps, its so obvious the blind eye you are turning. @fyrstikken told me what V2K and RNM was before they turned it on for me. Around that time he introduced me to @roelandp . I still have the emails between myself and @roelandp . This chain is centralized by design and @fyrstikken helped set it all up to fuck everyone, one by one, slowly into my situation. This is no joke you dumb mother fuckers, they shock you to your thoughts..... Hello????? It is in store for everyone you fools and your helping. Voices pulsed in your head and shocks to your thoughts??? Ignore me and help fuck innocent people for life? @roelandp and other top witnesses I know are involved with @fyrstikken.. Wait until people find out you conspired to enslave them with this shit. I am not crazy and you know it. they are doing this shit to me and told me what it mother fucking was BEFORE THEY TURNED IT ON! Your acting like naive children or maybe you are just part of the problem? You look like sociopaths. Everyone should unplug from HIVE until they are caught, .your. celebrating and ignoring my obvious, you look like fools. You know who is doing it....they are trying to kill me with it. The Havana Syndrome is real too you slave trading V2K, RNM enabling fuckers. Arrogantly play ignorant you Creeps, your setting the table for trafficking and total enslavement. I did not know I was circumvented until a year after I was..People here will be nice until it?s too late. There is no way to stop it once they have you. Grow the fuck up, this is not aliens, gods, celebrities or a medicate-able mental concern. It is 100% electronic and beast as fuck. You do not want this shit. https://ecency.com/fyrstikken/@fairandbalanced/i-am-the-only-motherfucker-on-the-internet-pointing-to-a-direct-source-for-voice-to-skull-electronic-terrorism ..... https://ecency.com/gangstalking/@acousticpulses/electronic-terrorism-and-gaslighting--if-you-downvote-this-post-you-are-part-of-the-problem