WEEKEND ENGAGEMENT 150: THE ALIEN AND I IN THE GARDEN

Edited in Canva

One evening, I was having a walk at the garden beside the church.
On getting close to one of the mango trees planted there, I noticed a figure move behind it. I stood for a while to be sure that I actually saw something. It moved again, and in that instance, fear gripped me and my heart started thumping. Immediately I started moving backwards. When the figure saw that I was backing out, it came out, behold it was an alien!

The alien said in slow and audible voice "Please don't go!" and stretched out his long fingered hands as if it wanted a handshake.

I stopped, and so many thoughts raced through my mind, what was an alien doing in the garden, what do I do now, should I call out for help or what?

As if he read my mind, the alien said again "Please don't go, I need your help!. I then summoned up courage and moved forward and said "hi, my name is luchyl, how may I help you?

The alien replied, I am Zoxir, I have been in this planet for some months now exploring your world and especially this beautiful garden. I love gardens and I know you do too because I have seen you here a couple of times. I have seen so many things and heard so many words spoken by your people, but these ones caught my attention;

Farting, masturbation and greed. I don't really understand what they are, can you please explain them to me?

I heaved a sigh of relief and replied, "okay I will tell you what they mean, but first let's go over there and sit down because my legs are shaking". He agreed and followed me.
As we sat down, I began thus:

Farting. When I said that, I chuckled, the alien looked at me and did same thing which made me start laughing and he joined in the laughter too and before you could say Jack! I released fart with a loud sound "pfuumm!!"
He shifted away from me with a look of bewilderment and I said, "I just farted didn't mean to, forgive my manners"
The alien nodded the head and asked;

Do people fart when they laugh?

To that I replied " not really but some people do. Anything can make one fart.
You know we take in air while sleeping, eating, talking , running and so on, and when the body has taken enough that it requires, the rest is passed out by farting.
"Farting" is the release of excess gas or air in the body system through the anus. It is a reflex action which when it comes cannot be controlled, although some do manage to hold it and excuse themselves to go release it elsewhere.
Farting can come in loud sound, like the one I just did, or silent sounds, stinky / smelly or odorless. Mine wasn't smelly you know and I let out another chuckle and it followed suit.

I continued "It is normal and healthy for one to fart because it indicates that the bacteria in the gut system which aids digestion is actually functioning."

The alien said "really?"

I replied yes, although some see farting as embarrassing, you shouldn't be afraid to fart when you have the urge because it's also a type of call of nature.

I continued,

• As humans we do have sexual desires at some point in time, you know, but sometimes we may not have a partner around to help satisfy these desires, so Masturbation is the next option. It is an act of satisfying one's sexual urges, desires by oneself through touching of the genitals. Some use sex toys whilst others do not. To some it is normal, while to others it is not. But in all it is said to be a healthy way for one to learn his or her body.

• Greed: Naturally, every human has the tendency to be greedy. Some are extreme, others do control theirs.
  Greed also called covetousness is a selfish, uncontrollable and excessive desire for something more than one's proper share or what one really need like food, power, money, position, possessions etc. Greed can lead one into being obsessed with things thereby refusing to share them with others.
  To drive my point home, I told him the story of "the Miser" who out of his obsession with money and greed for more ended up miserably. Another example of greed is some of our government officials who because they are in power amass wealth by stealing taxpayer's monies meant to be used in developing the towns, cities etc thereby subjecting the people to pains and suffering, while they enjoy with their families.
  To this the Alien said, "this is wicked", I don't think I can visit your planet again, and let out a grunt.

After few silence, the alien said, "well because of you, I will come back, you are a good person"
I thanked him and asked if my explanation was well understood. With a smile, he said "Yes I do, very well. Thanks for your time and sharing this wealth of knowledge with me. I appreciate.
I hope to see you soon.

With that, the alien stood up and started walking back to the garden same way he came, and after some steps I heard a loud sound "fruuuupppppsss", the alien turned, looked at me and chuckled. I laughed and said "wow, that fart was a bang"
He waved, turned and continued walking while I stood watching till I couldn't see his frame again.

This is my submission to the #weekendengagement topic

The clueless alien
You meet an alien and he asks you to explain the following three human things because he is confused about them. In a post of at least 300 words, explain each one as you would to the alien. Use photos you personally took where possible.
Farting
Masturbation
Greed

Thank you for reading my story.

I am @luchyl