My hardest truth. Learning acceptance through my father's death.

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(Edited)

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Hello my dear Hive family, today I am writing my first post in the Abundance Tribe for the beweekly question:

What's The Hardest Truth You Have Learned?

The hardest truth I have learned is that the Universe do not give us what we want, but what we need to grow, and that we have to accept everything that comes, not only what we see as good and positive, but also what we perceive as bad and negative, and we have to let go of wanting to control things we can't.

We should actually welcome all the challenges that show up in our life with open arms and embrace them, because they are meant to teach us something and only when we have learnt that lesson, that kind of challenge will stop showing up and we can level up, moving up to the next step in our evolution.

Everyone is on a personal path of evolution to finally become the true self that was meant to be in this material experience we call life. Probably personal evolution does not only go through one lifetime, but it could go through many more lifetimes, the problem is that we cannot remember any previous life so the only thing we can do is just keep going, making the best of our experience in the life we are currently living.

The hardest way I received this lesson about acceptance and letting go was exactly 2 years ago, when my father passed away.

I had just moved from Mallorca to Barcelona when one day I woke up reading a message that my sister sent me in the night, saying that my father was on a coma in a hospital in Italy.

Since the first moment I saw him lying on that hospital bed, breathing through a machine, I knew he was already gone, they were just trying to keep alive an empty vessel.

I had already experienced the death of two very close friends of mine, in different times but all so close to each other. It was very hard already but I had no idea how much harder the loss of such a close family member would have hit me.
So, it was for me an experience I have never had before and I went through it in a way I never tried before.
In my life I have a lot of experience with meditation and with psychedelics, which both helped me in difficult times and in my personal evolution process. I used psychedelics in different forms and for different purposes and different dosages.

I cannot explain why but, since the first day I went back to Italy to see my father about to pass until he actually died, I started taking low doses of psilocybin mushrooms that I collected the previous year. And I started meditating for hours everyday more than once, and when I was not sitting, I was practicing mindfulness.

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Self portrait.

But all this was still not enough, the pain was still there and it was overwhelming.

Then that night came. That same day they finally declared my father dead and I was sitting to start my meditation. I was just crying so hard and feeling all that pain, when I finally understood.

In front of such a big thing as final as physical death, I finally understood that it makes no sense to fight against what has already happened, that there is no way we can change it, there is no coming back, but also that it is alright to feel bad about it and we don't have to try to avoid that feeling.

So, I did it. I stopped refusing and pushing away all that pain and I dived right into it instead. I welcomed it and I let myself cry even harder and then what happened was incredible. I have never had such a deep meditation and I have never felt so much at peace and complete, all that suffering was transformed into something I only had a taste before but I have never experienced in such a fullness.

So one could say that we can transform negative energy into positive, but that is still a limitation of our dual mind. I would more correctly say that there is no positive or negative, that is just a personal point of view, in fact there is just energy, it is our interpretation of it that gives it an emotional charge to it.

After this very deep experience I was finally relieved from suffering for my father's death and I needed no farther mourning, I completely accepted it and went through it. Of course I still love my dad and I miss him from time to time, but I also know that what we call death only exists on a material level, it is in fact the return to The Source.
I still do not know how and if I could have gone through it, if it did not happen this way and I understand how hard it could be for other people in similar situations.

This helped changing my life a lot, now I have no more excuses, I know what challenges in life are for and that the only possible way to go through them is to consciously face them, not trying to avoid them or to pretend they are not there and I hope you could learn the same lesson without needing to go through such a terrible experience like the death of a loved one.

THANKS FOR READING, WRITING HAS BEEN A PLEASURE, I WISH YOU ALL MUCH ABUNDANCE AND LOVE!!! 💙💜💚

I am also a photographer and a musician, trying to spread good inspiring content on Hive. You can visit my blog right here.

KrustyMusic.jpg



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13 comments
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i went through similar experiences after my father's passing last year...

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I am sure you can understand then, thanks for reading and sharing. 🙏

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Manually curated by brumest from the @qurator Team. Keep up the good work!

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Thank you very much for your support!

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The best way to heal from pain or mistakes is to embrace them accept them and walk towards doing better, because the more you push them away or the more you hide from them it only keeps hurting you.

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A toast for your father & our beloved ones who passed away!

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Love means letting go. It's inspiring to see how you share this side of you with us!

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Congratulations, @roger.remix You Successfully Shared 0.100 WINEX With @krusty81.
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(Edited)

Wonderful answer @krusty81, the earth does provide us with what we need, each challenge, no matter how difficult is an opportunity for learning and growth xxx

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