What habits or addictions, both good and bad, have you developed and which you would like to get rid of? | QOTW Season 10.3

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There are so many things that we as human beings don't recognize in ourselves just because we have been conditioned to be looking outwards. And, what I mean by this is that, we have a "me" bias, or at least that's what I call it. This is evident in our daily lives while driving, queuing at the grocery store, dealing with your boss and subordinates, negotiating with clients, family relations, and the list goes on. We, ourselves, are always innocent and the opposite party is always guilty, which may or may not be the case.

Personally, I think that this QOTW is a nice way to remind us to look at ourselves and try to see acquired habits and attitudes from a different lens: from the lens of neutrality. I mean, if there is a traffic altercation, was I in any way responsible for it, or is it the other driver's fault? Am I getting the bad end of a deal or is this a fair and win-win agreement?

So, that is the "bad habit" that I would like to get rid of, the "me-bias". Since by nature we have this tendency for self-preservation, I think that it is a natural thing to have that fight or flight mode ready when needed, but I believe that sometimes it goes too far. I always tend to look at it as the other side is trying to pull a fast one on me, which might not be far from the truth also.

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I tend to be strict whenever I am negotiating for prices with vendors; I usually end up with the better deal, but I've had my share of mistakes too when I ended up with the raw end of the deal. The solution I see is to be fair in evaluating myself and what I bring to the table. On the other hand, I should also look at what the other party is bringing to the table, which is sometimes difficult to do in the heat of the moment.

Family matters can also be a sticky point, especially for Filipinos. Because we are a traditional family-oriented people, we tend to be biased towards family members also, which I think is an extension of the "me-bias". We tend to be swayed in favor of family members and sometimes don't even look objectively. An example of this is when a child gets into a fight at school. The parent will naturally side with his or her children. Extreme familial-bias have been around and will always be around, but it won't hurt if we are aware of this too.

_{Image by 5540867 from Pixabay}

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I guess what I'm trying to say, and I just realized while free-writing this blog post, is that I am too selfish and greedy. And that there is a need to temper this tendency or habit, if you will, to be more balanced and just, when I look at and deal with others, in negotiating, and in decision making.

That said, it isn't as easy for me to do. So, thanks for reading through this rambling jumble of a blog post. I know you get what I mean.

That's it for this blog post. Love and peace!

@juanvegetarian