My breaking point as a mother
Becoming a mum has made me more sensitive than I was. I tend to carefully organize things especially around my child to make sure she doesn't hurt herself.
She is at the stage where everything and anything she touches goes straight into her mouth. So I try so hard to clean the house and mop the floor every time.
I want to have a healthy child and this is the reason why I am being meticulous about staying in a very neat environment. I can't stand watching my child falling sick or even getting hurt. It will break me so much. So for me, it is better I take the pain to clean up always.
A long time friend visited earlier today and wore her shoe into the house. I calmly asked her to put her shoe outside. I told her the reason was because of my daughter and the need to ensure she doesn't pick up any dirt that may be under her shoes to put into her mouth.
This friend of mine made a joke about my words. She told me that children eat dirt and then asked me why I think that my own child is different. She didn't even stop there. She tried to even pick up a little concrete on the floor to give my girl to eat. In her words, she said all these things will make her grow strong.
I lost it at that moment. I shouted at her and asked her to leave my house at once since she wasn't ready to comply with my rules.
Like why the hell do people even think that they can come into people's homes and want to rule against some principles that have been set by the owners of the house?
She was shocked at my reaction and even mocked me by saying that I am not the best mother in the world and if I think that caging my child is the best for me, then I am wrong.
I cried so much and those last words from her didn't just go away. I heard them ring so loud in my ears for hours. Am I really a bad mum? I called my mum to ask her if I was being too careful with my child and my mum said NO.
I know sometimes I overreact when it comes to my baby. I am always careful with how people carry her or when we go somewhere that's crowded. I tend to keep my eyes close to her so that I can protect just in case something goes wrong.
Does that make me a bad mother?
At this point, I am just wondering if I am really overdoing some things. Maybe I should just let my child explore and find herself. But isn't it too early to let her play and hurt herself? What does she know? She is just 16months.
I really do not know what to think anymore. I am so pained at what my friend did to me today. I didn't expect her to say those hurtful words to me.
Did I go overboard? Where did I go wrong with my actions? I will like some advice here..
I understand that as a mother you try to protect your child, and that's fine, nobody likes to get sick our children, certainly your child is at an age that wants to explore and puts everything in her mouth, so it is necessary to keep the spaces clean and keep small things and dangerous substances away from her reach, I was also like that with my children when they were small, do not feel like a bad mother, I recommend that you take her to places where she is in contact with nature that she can explore, but you next to her supervising. Greetings and I hope everything goes well.
Yes we plan on visiting the beach this weekend. I know it is going to be so much work for me because my eyes needs to be glued on her. But like you said she needs to explore too.
Thank you so much for your suggestion
I think your friend was rude, we must all maintain respect in someone else's house and if you consider that it is for the good of your daughter that person must abide by those rules and if they do not agree, it is better not to visit.
Little by little we are giving our children permission to explore different environments, and your daughter will be old enough to play with dirt or any other environment that is suitable for her healthy development, I wish you many blessings in this process of being a mother 🤗
You have just hit the nail on the head. It is better not to visit at all. I hope she doesn't even visit again since she cannot respect my simple decision.
I will try to expose my daughter to things of life but with careful supervision too
Thank you so much for your kind words.