Hello! Everyone. Welcome to my blog. Hope you are having a great weekend. In today's blogpost I would be talking about a cheating partner. My way of handling a cheating partner, my desired outcome from fixing the relationship and finding forgiveness for betrayal.

Cheating partner

The partner who has proven to be unfaithful, broken a trust that was handed over to him, crushed his promises which he had many times vowed to keep and then exposed what we once shared and to the cruel hands of hate, bitterness, depression and unforgiveness exposed our relationship. He has betrayed me and our relationship. The moment I found out, I would be broken into different atoms and then particles, my emotions would conceal a race of despicable hate words and the anger and fury would need an enormous volume of deep breathing to restore and control my emotion.

Handling a cheating partner
In this situation, I would be needing wisdom to act maturely. Curtailing my reaction and emotions by activating anger control, it would help me stay focused and rational. It is normal and easy to be raving mad and probably raise a voice to justify my anger. I have every right to be angry and react harshly, but it's not the best way or decision as I would utter words that I can't take back at the verge of my outburst.

Secondly, I would call for a "hey! We need to talk" meeting. I would really love to know the reason why he cheated. It's true that no reason can justify infidelity. Being unfaithful is a choice, with or without a reason. To be honest he would have to open up to me in all honesty, I want to hear all of it.

Thirdly, if we cannot come to a resolution then it is actually beyond me, we would have to bring in a third party. A therapist, counsellor or our family, whichever one that would help guide us on how to resolve this issue.

My desired outcome
My desired outcome totally lies on my personal values and how far we have gone into the relationship, what we have achieved having considered all that then I will know whether to reconcile or not. If after what he has done I still love him and I believe in what we have and shared, then I would consider working on the relationship.

This isn't going to be easy but with patience, commitment, understanding and willingness to work on the relationship we can achieve lost trust with time along the line, because after he has cheated, the relationship would take another shape. I would have a different perspective of his personality which would be visible in my behaviour towards him. Redefining our relationship would be a healthy option, in such a way that transparency and clearer expectations would be established around fidelity.

Rebuilding trust is a positive outcome of the fixing process. He has shattered the trust he once merited and right now it's going to be difficult to trust him, nonetheless it's a process that requires time to restore. So if he would open up to me in all honesty taking responsibility for his actions then I would consider practising forgiveness for his sake. I would need to see some level of consistency in total commitment in his behaviour or action. He would also need to address the reason(s) that led to infidelity.

Finding forgiveness for betrayal
In as much as it is difficult for me to forgive such atrocity, I would need time to practise forgiveness. I would let go of resentment because I choose to move forward in the relationship. I decided to let us work on the relationship therefore no need to hold on to his mistakes for a longer time notwithstanding the fact that I won't be able to forget his infidelity.

What do you think about this? Here is the link to share your opinion?

Photo by Diva Plavalaguna: source

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