My Opinion On Marriage
My Opinion On Marriage
Marriage is indeed a beautiful thing, the best definition for onenes and partnership is marriage. Of a truth it is one of the wonderful things that happens to humans. This special Union between a man and a woman is ideally supposed to be a blessing and not a curse.
All the religions in the world permit marriage, that is enough for us to know that is it a good thing. Unfortunately, marriage these days has turned into the opposite of what is was originally supposed to be.
I wouldn't want to push blames to any gender for this because once a natural order is breached, we should be rest assured that there would be aberration. Each time I want to talk about the subject of marriage the first question that pops up in my mind is, why do we get married? Or why are you getting married?
The answer you give to this question alone is enough to determine how your home would be. You know many people think marriage is all about having fun, making kids and having someone to cater for your needs and another to be subject to you. Some feel they are lonely and empty so they need to get married so that they can be around someone.
People go into marriage with wrong ideas and you discover that it doesn't last. Once you miss the formula to a particular equation, you will never arrive at the right answer. The motives you carry to marriage is very important. I think this is enough to test for us to knw whether we are matured for marriage or not because having a happy family has nothing to do with age. It's the matter of maturity.
Marriage is first of all not about making children, having fun, and the rest, no! The first important thing about marriage is the unity. Sorry to inform you that some person's won't be able to make babies, some partners can be so weird and annoying to be with. If your major focused is not first on blending with that person, please don't get married. If not you will soon be separated.
You are coming together to be one, all the fun and the babies and the rest are the added advantage, but marriage is the coming together of two different individuals to be one. It's like putting another person into your own self. Automatically that person becomes you and whatever happens to you happens to the person as well.
If we focused a lot on benefits rather than being one, we will fail in marriage but if we are able to attain that oneness we will be productive and those advantages that our eyes are craving for will come naturally in abundance.
Meaning Of Marriage From Personal Observation
Honestly, 90% of the marriages I am seeing around today are scaring me from the word marriage, instead of love and peace, most homes are in crises. Marriage now looks like a place to just make babies and have someone whom you could hide under. A little misunderstanding and the couples are already either divorced or keeping malice.
I often wonder where the love during relationships goes to immediately after wedding, sometimes I feel, they were only pretending to love each other so that they can have an opportunity to get what they want and afterwards everything just dies.
In many homes today, you find lack of unity starting from the parents down to the kids, the fsther doesn't trust his wife, the wife doesn't want to submit to her husband and the kids are even divided, some are the father's kids and some their mother's. It just looks as if they were forced into this thing.
However in some families, there is peace and understanding, love is perfectly shared, there is unity and all that is needed (don't misquote me, nothing is ever 100% perfect) I have seen families that made me wished I am married already. I have seen people lived with such genuine understanding and it makes me wonder how they were able to maintain that.
There is no ready-made perfect marriage, you will have to build one for yourself, I bet you, it's not a day job but believe me, if you can give it a try, you can have it too.
With what I have observed from marriages, I understood that marriage is not a cage and set back as some people see it as. It is also not the bed of roses as some see it as. Marriage is neither a place of responsibility, one can't go into it, fold arms and expect magic to happen. It is a place of making
It is soley left for one to decide what he/she has as marriage, there is nothing like miracle in getting a perfect home, it is your responsibility to make it. However if you fail to build it, you will have a bad home and that you have yourself to blame.
Unfortunately, many people choose to neglect their responsibilities in making a better home and end up having shattered homes. You would agree with me that it is easier to have problematic marriages these days than have a peaceful and happy ones
The truth remains that those who have such homes choose it. I will leave you with these little piece of advice, once you know you are not ready to be one with a person, please don't marry him/her. It's for you own good. The reason is because it is when you become truly one with your partner that your marriage will bring forth good fruits.
It is when you are truly united that even when love fades you will still be with you partner, overlook wrongs and keep pushing together because you are one flesh your partner is equal to you.
Does It Worth The Troubles?
Marriage is worth whatever challenge it comes with it, good things dont come easy. For a thing as good as marriage, even if its takes one getting bruises along the way, it is worth.
But i think it is worth reasonable trials not the type of troubles we see around.
In conclusion
Marriage is supposed to be an institution of peace, love, help and so on, so I don't think it should be experiencing the kind of trouble it is experiencing today. Most homes are in crises because they lack understanding and until everyone in the family comes to realize their mistakes and work on themselves, these issues may continue.
One can have a good home, if both of them have better understanding of each other because marriage demands a lot of sacrifices
This is My Entry For Week 65 Edition 01 contest with the title Marriageon Hive Learners community. You can do well by checking it Out in the community
Well, I you have said it all. The problem with most marriages these days is that people go into them due to peer pressure, especially the female folks and you wouldn't blame them because society always pester a lady who is supposed to be married but isn't with questions like "why are you not married" or "when will you marry"
Seriously this peer pressure something has really landed a lot of people into wrong marriages. Unfortunately some ladies don't want to still learn from it.
Thanks for the wonderful contribution sir
Thanks for the lovely post. Most marriages nowadays are built on deceit and material possessions. Once those materials are gone, the love will die, and majority of female folks marry wrongly cause of pressure from their friends and family.
People don't know that there are lots of sacrifices in marriage than just wedding ceremony
Exactly, whenever those materials things are gone, the marriage will start having fault because it was not built on the right ground . We really need to understand what marriage is all about before we venture into it. It's not just about I love u, I love you...
Thanks so the contribution ma💕🥰
Yes o, only love can't sustain marriage. There are alot of essential things that must be put in place too.
You are right, that's why recently, I have been chasing good materials on marriage. It's not just love alone....
Before going into any marriage, you need to understand your real you or else you won't understand your partner , thanks for sharing
Hmmm.. I love this piece, if one doesn't understand himself, he can't really understand his/her partner indeed.. I think if we able to understand ourselves and allow our partners the access to understand us as well as we understand them too, the equation will be balanced
Marriage is an institution where people who entered don't graduate. Only the strong minds stay through to the end🤗
LoL.. that doesn't mean our eyes are not on you, do and marry sir🤣🤣🤣
Of a truth, marriage is not for children, it's for matured minds... Only the tough ones can push it successfully till the end...
Well written piece. I can agree with everything you wrote.
The only thing I would add to your piece is that it separates the home from the society that it is in. Unfortunately in today's world people are bombarded by images of other women/men. Hit with sexuality all over the place. There are financial issues in every household around the world. Usually from too little money but sometimes from too much! There are just so many stresses from OUTSIDE the home and it affects the INSIDE of the home.
Marriage has gone from the old viewpoint of devotion and dedication to the new viewpoint of self satisfaction.
It's very sad because for those who are willing to put in the work and be part of a team marriage is truly very special.
Each time I get a feed back from you , I get so excited because I know I am going to learn more.
Marriage these days has really shifted from what it is meant to be. Materialism and desires of of the flesh has taken over several homes. Unfortunately, these things don't last forever, the day they eventually come to an end, problems will surely visit such homes.
Thank you so much for this wonderful contribution..
Oh man.... I appreciate those words. You are sure setting the bar high for me though. Now I actually have to think harder because people are actually reading my responses 😉🤣
As for materialism and desires of the flesh destroying marriage. I'll have to think about that for a moment because honestly I don't think those are the major issues.
The bible actually does have a verse about "desires of the flesh"
Which more or less says that when it comes to sex anything goes and have fun! lesser known bible fact with the exception of sex during menstruation.
As for being materialistic. My wife really likes material things. She keeps asking me when she will get her 1 karat diamond... and when she got one she asks when will she get one with more sparkle. She also keeps asking for her BMW or Mercedes. Although she has recently admitted that *"I've lived with you too long. I keep wanting a Mercedes but whenever I see the price tag I keep thinking--too expensive!". I'm cheap and she says my frugality has worn off on her.
But the point is wanting material things doesn't kill a marriage.
What kills a marriage is if you are not working towards those material things together.
Desires of the flesh don't kill a marriage. Desire of the flesh OUTSIDE of the marriage kill the marriage.
The key similarity between the two is that: In a marriage the TWO become ONE. My marriage works because its not ME its WE. We work towards getting a nice home. We work towards a nice vehicle. We work at raising the kids. We...well, everything starts with we in a marriage. However, marketing is directed as the YOU. You deserve a nice car. You deserve a nice house. You should enjoy life.
People have been trained to be selfish and centered on themselves. In my opinion its that viewpoint that needs to change.
Then again, that's just my opinion, feel free to disagree if you like 😎
Actually I look forward to you picking apart my postings. I have to shorten them far more than I like to keep things to a reasonable level (500-1000 words) and that often means I leave out key parts due to lack of words.
Thanks for your feedback, I really do appreciate it.
Side note: Hope you join us in the topic of the week in #Frugal not stingy. Your sneak peak on the post is it will be "Our daily bread".
I must first of all apologize for late reply... I am really sorry..
You are a big blessing to my life here, I have learnt a lot from you already, I wish I could be coming around for more lectures.
Concerning my point on material things and desires of the flesh breaking some homes, so to say, I am talking about people whose major focus in marriage is the either sexual satisfaction or material things. I have seen women who got married simply because the man is wealthy and men who got married because they wanted to satisfy they sexual desires. All these things are benefits of marriage but if a person puts his focus on them the day those things cease to be, the marriage would be shaking. Those things are really good but they should not be primary in marriage. Just my opinion though🥰
I am really working towards coming to
frugalI am trusting God to check this week's prompt..Thanks so much for the time sir ❤️
Ahhh... you were talking about a marriage of convenience. Husband gets a trophy wife (beautitul) and the wife gets a sugar daddy (money). In some ways I support it as a civil union but not sure I truly qualify it as a marriage in a Biblical sense. If ever I was widowed I think that would be the only way I'd ever find a wife (which is a reason why I won't remarry if I'm ever widowed). However, I certainly see the appeal for others.
I hope you will join this weeks topic "our daily bread"
and if I may make a small request. My name is Jason or Jay. As a brother in Christ I don't see the need for sir. 😄
Hahah.. I pray you reach old age with your partner such that there would be need for another marriage when either of you is gone.
I would come over to frugal God's willing
I know this might sound funny but calling you by your name sounds disrespectful. I'll look for something else though😁