LOVE: An Unexpected Turn

Dear Junior...

I guess I cannot wait to tell you about love. It has been around me a lot these days. Well, I think it has been, because every Saturday, I see folks getting dressed in their best dresses, men in shining blazers, or articulate Atiku or senator attire. Women in carefully designed gowns, with a lot of shinny things around the busts or the waist. I see them in classy shoes and fancy necklaces and bangles going for one wedding program or the other... A testimony to the fact that people are finding love constantly. Now, whether that is true love or not is another ball game entirely.

Love is not scarce. I mean finding someone to love is not hard. There are always fishes in the ocean. You know what is hard? Finding someone who would truly love you, someone you can truly love. That is hard as hell. Most people who find true love at first try are considered as really lucky. That is why a lot of folks do trial and error, from one relationship to another.

Wait... something just occurred to me. Maybe true love is not so hard to find, maybe there are too many lazy people who are not ready to give their commitment to any one person. Maybe all we have a folks more concerned about mundane things that the future or commitment or fulfilment. Now that I think about it even deeply, I realize that true love is 2 people giving themselves to each other in commitment.

I have been using the word "commitment" a lot. I like the word. It is rich with meaning. It is a word that shouts "dedication", "devotion", "allegiance", "Loyalty"... It has so many synonyms. But none of them are as enticing to me as this word "sacrifice". I don't know if it is a proper synonym, but i am certain that if there is one thing that commitment needs, it is sacrifice. And that is exactly how love is spelt. True love is sacrifice. But most times, it seems too painful a price to pay.

You are young, and I believe that this is the perfect time to tell you that that thing you were feeling in your tummy, like a thousand butterflies were swarming inside whenever you saw that girl you had a crus on is not love, it is basic human chemistry. It is totally normal for you to feel attracted to a girl, that is what millions of years of evolution has done for mankind.

Adaptation prioritized reproduction for our species so that we would not go into extiction. So, naturally, biological responses developed to ensure that mating that would lead to conception was quicker and more pleasurable...That is why sex is a pleasurable experience. Today is not for sex education.

I was saying that the things you feel on your body, the chills you feel whenever she touches you is not love... it is chemistry, your body reacting as a natural response. If you touch something hot, you'd feel pain and immediately remove your hands. In the same way, when you see an attractive lady, your body's natural response would be the same response that the cave man had a billion years ago- sex.

Love is not feeling! LOVE IS NOT FEELING! Shey you get it now? You don't love a lady you are not ready to be committed to. You don't love a lady you cannot boldly take responsibility for. That is not love. Love is loyalty, commitment, and all the synonyms I listed previously. But most importantly, Love is sacrifice.