Ah.... this was a day that my wife and I were looking forward to... well, probably just me... I'm not really sure that my wife was fussed one way or another about it!

It is now a bit over 3 months since I had my vasectomy... and that means that it is time to get tested to see if I still have sperm in my ejaculate! Yay... exciting times! So, I'm really hoping that the procedure was successful, because I'm really not that keen to have a second round of feeling like someone has kicked me in the balls for a week and a bit... on the other hand, I did sort of enjoy the moment of awkwardness when people asked me why I was moving slower or acting a little less animated than usual... and I would reply that I had been recently de-sexed. I don't ever think that that was ever the reason that they would be expecting... and it would derail the conversation a little bit in a funny sort of way!

Anyway... it is necessary to get a proper test, just to make sure that there aren't any sperm left in the stuff that comes out. And that meant that I just needed to masturbate into this cup here... Trust me, I've been trying for a couple weeks to try and figure out exactly how that was going to work... but in the end, it proved to be a good deal easier than I had thought. Overthinking things doesn't really make it easier... but I do have say that there arne't really any good guides or walkthrough on this sort of thing. There are guides for many things... but for semen collection... it is just a bunch of DON'Ts and now real clear idea of how to get the stuff from inside of me to inside of the cup without making a mess everywhere. Maybe one of these days... I'll write up a little "how-to".

Anyway... part of the problem today was that I have a limited amount of time when I'm in my home city (due to the touring work...) that also coincide with the times that the pathology clinics are open (during the weekdays). So... weirdly enough, I had to really plan out the moment when which I had to produce the sample and then race it down to the clinic (no pressure...).

So, the critical instruction was that the sample needed to be less than 1 hour old... so, there was a clock ticking from the moment that it was produced and bagged, through to the time when it was handed over to the pathology lab.

So, like a trooper... I carefully planned out everything. I had 90 minutes from the end of my last lesson to the time when I needed to be doing a long drive to Sydney. Perfect... I made sure to call the pathology lab in the morning to double check that it was no problem to drop off the sample. And then... at that moment, it was just time to get the deed done and then race off in the car to the lab and then onwards to Sydney.

Unfortunately, in my bleary eyed state in the morning... I had mistakenly called the WRONG pathology lab after not double checking the Google Search. Unfortunately for me, the receptionist who answered my call didn't pick up on the mistake either... and so they answered my questions about whether I needed to make an appointment and what I actually needed to bring and do.

Then... when I arrived (keeping in mind the 1 hour time limit... )... they took the sample to the lab... and got the response that that particular location DID NOT do the semen analysis... and that I needed to head to another lab location! So... with 21 minutes spent... I dashed to car, and did the 30 minute drive to the next location...

... dumped my car in a NOT parking spot and raced into the lab. Only to be told by the nurse on duty that I had gone to the WRONG PATHOLOGY company! SHIT SHIT SHIT... and that was critical, because of the referral from the doctor. So... by this time, I only had minutes left on the clock and no ability to teleport to the right pathology lab.

So... a disappointing outcome. On the other hand, the nurse was really nice and told me where and how to do everything. Unfortunately, I will have to wait 2-5 days before preparing another sample... and that also needs to lock in with a time that I'm back in Canberra... AND lock in with a working time with the Pathology lab.

... so, a delay in the plans...

... oh well, what is a week or so more? It has already been a few months...

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